Watermelons and Cheese

Watermelons and Cheese is a Sesame Street song about how you should never answer the phone with simply the phrase "watermelons and cheese" (unless you're a watermelon or a cheese yourself) as that'd be too absurd.

Lyrics
Man: Answering the telephone is not so hard to do.

Once you know the secret which I shall show to you.

What you say, that's the key!

And it's easy as it can be!

You can say...

Bert: Hello. No, this isn't Ernie's ducky.

Man: Or perhaps.

Cookie Monster: Hello. You got cookie for me, please?

Man: Or.

The Count: Hello. You have called a number one.

Man: But don't say, "Watermelons and cheese".

Background Singers: No, you don't say.

Man: Watermelons and.

Background Singers: You don't say.

Man: Watermelons and.

Background Singers: You never say.

Man: Watermelons and cheese!

Background Singers: Please try again.

Man: This shall be a breeze. Watermelons and cheese! Oh, sorry.

Background Singers: You can say.

Bert: Hello. Bernice, it's for you.

Background Singers: Or perhaps.

Cookie Monster: Hi. Me get off now. Me eating cookies.

Background Singers: Or.

The Count: Hello. You have called at number two. Ha ha ha.

Background Singers: You can do it!

Man: Watermelons and cheese!

Background Singers: No, you don't say.

Man: Watermelons and.

Background Singers: You don't say.

Man: Watermelons and.

Background Singers: You never say.

Man: Watermelons and cheese.

Background Singers: Please try again.

Man: This shall be a breeze. Watermelons and cheese!

Background Singers: No!

Man: Jolly good. Not a problem. I think I've got it now! You don't say. You never, never say.

Watermelon: Watermelons and cheese!

Man: Unless you're a watermelon.

Watermelon: It's for you.

Man: Or a cheese.

Cheese: Oh, good on you to call.